slammerkinbabe: (!me (eyesme))
[personal profile] slammerkinbabe
Hi, all! Have a meme, courtesy of [livejournal.com profile] celandineb!

How this works:

You comment, I give you an age (please tell me how old you currently are - I don't know all of your ages, unfortunately, so I don't want to pick an age for you that is impossible) and you fill out the meme questions with what applied to you back then, and now.

[livejournal.com profile] celandineb gave me age 20.

At 20...

I lived in

My dorm at Harvard, most of the year. At 20 I was still rooming with an excellent roommate with whom I got along very well, even if she was ten times smarter and more driven than I was.

I drove:

Nothing. At the time I think I still thought I was going to get a license eventually, though, and I was attached to the idea of getting a lime-green Volkswagen Beetle, which I thought perfectly summed up my aesthetic even though at that time no one was talking about their aesthetic.

I was in a relationship with:

I think I was on the tail end of 20 when I got in my first relationship, with a brilliant, charismatic, intermittently charming girl who turned out to have a case of borderline personality disorder that wound up making me miserable. Despite changing her hairstyle weekly I don't think she ever actually had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead, but it is certainly true that when she was good she was very very good and when she was bad she was horrid. And I was addicted to her, thereby fueling a lot of drama that couldn't have occurred without my emotional complicity.

I feared:

Change. The future. Adulthood.

I worked at:

The Harvard Coop, which is Harvard's official bookstore. At the time I think I was still a good employee there; I think the year when I was 20 was the brief mentally-healthy respite that I had when I had gotten my bipolar disorder mostly under control but had not yet lost my sanity to my relationship with the girl who didn't have a curl right in the middle of her forehead. By 21 I think I had started to be a terrible employee, but you didn't ask about 21.

***

NOW! (34 years old)

I live in:

Boston, in the same zip code where I grew up. We have a very nice little house and I feel very settled.

I drive:

Nothing, and at this point I don't intend to, because I have realized that thanks to the spatial-relations difficulties I have that are a consequence of my NLD, I would probably kill somebody. (I know some people with NLD can drive and do just fine, but my few attempts at learning to drive have gone spectacularly badly.) I hope Uber doesn't get regulated out of existence, because cabs won't come to where we live, and Uber has been a godsend.

I'm in a relationship with:

λ, my wife. She's lovely beyond words.

I fear:

Change, still. Not being able to get pregnant. Losing λ. Losing my intellect.

I work at:

A transcription center. It's mindless work, but it's a paycheck and it gives me structure and a routine.

I want to be:

A mother. A writer. A better human being than I am at present.
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